The actions of the old self were the best we could do, according to the range of perception (about ourselves and life) we had then.
The actions of the present phase are suitable to the range of perception of now. Apparently, it is wider, since you "see" things you didn't see back then, and you adjust, you behave according to the conclusions of the now.

Being ashamed or feeling guilt is useful, but only if it stays "here" only for the time needed to act as your new self; not more. If it stays more, it gets us into a ratrace of guilt that's not useful, it's not practical and evolving.

So, yes, there are past behaviours of mine of which I am not proud, but I used the moments of their realization to not repeat them. The shame is gone now. There's just a bit of discomfiture for some of them when memory brings them back, but I remind myself that I cannot change the past, and that I used my rralizations for a better version of me.

This is a beautiful and courageous piece. : )