I read it twice, and one thing is obvious to me: There is a choice you made that defeats all the labels you gave to Ana; you chose to be an observer of yourself. Consciously or unconsciously chosen, it doesn’t matter. As long as your …stubbornness keeps you in the position of the self-observer, treasures won’t stop emerging.

A confession like this has the willpower as prerequisite, Ana. You couldn't have done it, if you were about to surrender.